Lacking Consistency

    
     I just came to the realization that my life is lacking consistency, and it's been that way ever since I can remember. Perhaps, everyone has realized this at some point, which is why I'm realizing it now. Although, now that I'm thinking about it, I've become frustrated. My desire for a sense of stability has been ever growing since I graduated college. I have moved several times over the last 6 years. By several I mean 18 or so times. On average I move three times a year. In 2010, alone I've moved 9 times. Although the majority of those 9 are from AmeriCorps, but if you don't count my 6 AmeriCorps moves, I've still moved 3 times this year. I anticipate moving again, not before the end of this year, but eventually I'll have to move. Perhaps next September, I'll move farther from work and closer to the city. But I don't want to think about moving because my already frustrated move has now soured. I'm sure I will, it's inevitable, but I don't have to worry about it right now. Not right now, which is what has saved me from dwelling on stability, because all I have to do is think about right now. Right now, I'm relatively safe. Right now, my bills are paid or will be paid. Right now I have food in my belly or the ability to put it there. Right now, I have the ability to put my clothes on my back, if they're not already there. Thinking about the here and the now has saved me from thinking about the what ifs, thinking about the what could be's, the future.
       It's a scary thing, the future. Anything can happen between here and tomorrow. It's unpredictable, it's unstable. And I suppose, it's that way for everybody. At least there's solidarity in numbers.

It's before midnight, did you expect something that made sense?