Dungeness Crabs are delicious, if not smelly.

San Francisco, is an amazing City, it’s now in my top five places I’d like to end up. I love places where there is no possible way to see everything in just one weekend. Although, we didn’t see everything we did see a lot. On our first full day we bought some Kara’s Cupcakes, delicious, although mine are way better. Yeah, I said it. We then hit up the cable cars and rode them from Fisherman’s Wharf to Lombardi Street; the view from the crooked street is so gorgeous. The city is gorgeous from wherever you view it, but probably one of my favorite picture spots. I love the way San Francisco is laid out it’s such a change from the straight rows and cookie cutter houses of Florida’s subdivision communities. Although we couldn’t drive down Lombardi Street until later, we did enjoy watching the cars trying to maneuver the wicked curves. I would never want to live on that street, especially with my driving record. We hiked up the steep hill and hopped back on the cable car to Chinatown.

Overpriced and hokey, Chinatown was filled with many an angry Asian. Maybe they’re irritated by all of the tourists or unhappy about the poorly decorated streets, or they just don’t like it when people take pictures. We wandered the streets until we found the Fortune Cookie Factory, which was quaint, but unfortunately took away the mystery of how they get the little cookies into such an odd shape. I have to say that fortune cookies taste better hot. Hungry, and not satisfied by our china crackers we went in search for some local cuisine. Luckily, there were some nice ladies handing out coupons for lunch and so on my suggested we headed for the specials. Unfortunately, it was probably the most overpriced restaurant in all of Chinatown. The service was awful, but we entertained ourselves with conversation and discussions of what to do next. We decided that we’d look at a few more stores and try and find the front gates. On our way we stopped in a store filled from top to bottom with Asian themed souvenirs, including animal hats. We decided to take pictures and were ushered out of the store due to a ridiculous no picture policy. After some encouragement by my bro, I decided it would only be appropriate for me to go back and take a picture of the shopkeeper with a bad attitude. He flicked me off, we chuckled and made our way to the gates. I have to say that all in all Chinatown is my second least favorite part of San Francisco, after Haight-Ashbury.

Here is the shopkeeper that flicked me off

I think I expected too much out of the artsy-hippie side of town. I thought that the place where the free love movement was started, and home to many famous 60’s personas would be the best part of this crazy city. Unfortunately, head shops aren’t any fun if you’re not going to partake in illegal substances. I mean they had really pretty looking pipes, but the smell of pot, incense and week old body odor made my stomach churn. This dirty grungy part of San Francisco was not appealing. It’s filled with bums and stoners and the two of them combined is the second most foul smell I’ve ever encountered, second only to the Tazo Wild Orange Tea at Starbucks. We wandered up and down Haight trying to find something interesting, but once you’ve seen one head shop you’ve seen them all. I never got into tie-dye and peace signs, and my brother was more than happy to get out of there. So we headed toward what we thought was going to be beautiful Golden Gate Park, and although it was Golden Gate Park, it was filled with drum circles, homeless people talking to themselves and the distinct smell of weed. We had imagined this park with beautiful flowers and an unforgettable view of the famous bridge. We learned later that we were at the wrong end of the park, but after walking several miles we decided it was best to find a view of the city.

My mom suggested the Fairmont, which she heard from a friend that from the top it was the best view of the city San Francisco had to offer, and I’m sure if we were allowed to the top it would have been. When we sat in the pirate style Tonga room down below drinking overpriced cocktails she revealed to us that her friend was a resident of San Francisco 10 years ago. In that 10 years the Fairmont decided that it would rather host private parties than cheap tourists trying to find a good view. In the end, I didn’t mind trading an awesome view of the city for a deliciously overpriced scorpion bowl, and a bar filled with all things pirate. After $50 worth of drinks (4 drinks in total, and no not per person), we headed for dinner at Cioppino’s at Fisherman’s Wharf.

This place had some delicious seafood, my mom and I ordered the signature dish which was a soup filled with Dungeness crab, muscles, scallops, fish and all the other delicious creatures of the ocean. Filled with Seafood and warmed by locally brewed beer we headed to a Martini bar near our hotel and scoped out some men for my mom. She was too shy to really talk to anyone, but my friend and I made friends with an Irishman named Patrick, not spelled Padraig, just in case you were wondering. Still shifted from the time zone difference we headed back to the hotel for sleep, and sweetly dreamed of the busy day ahead.